Exactly. Shooter size, age, physical shape, hand/arm strength, hand size, finger length, body position, (can be different from shooting position depending...) handgun type/style, scope/no scope, barrel length, weight, balance, grip (thickness, material, size, style, etc.), material used for grips/forend, shooting position, gloves/no gloves, weather temp, standing, sitting, etc. are all factors that are really not constants in the handgun shooting world. What recoils "a lot" to you may or may not be the same to me, and vice versa. And a brake does not really enter into this subjectively except to make the felt recoil less, which negates the actual question.

Even your mood and general personality are factors. Genetics are a factor; ie. pain tolerance is mostly genetic; the list goes on and on.

So reasonably, we each have our own recoil tolerance limits; and that is as it should be. Doesn't make anybody any better or any tougher or more macho; it just is what it is.

That said, my FA 83 4 3/4" bbl. in 500WE with heavy 440 gr. loads got my attention real fast. I since sold it; not because of the recoil; rather because I sorely needed the money at the time.